What did I miss? It's not easy for a junkie like me to set aside the site for a few weeks under almost any circumstance, so setting it aside to learn the rule against perpetuities and other provisions of the black letter law (of which I have zero interest and will never use) was a challenge in discipline of the tallest order.

And yet, I not only survived, but as I resume my seat at the breakfast table, I didn't miss a damn thing. Scrolling down the right sidebar a few clicks reveals the following Most Commented Stories: Austin Dining / Ryan Perrilloux Jackassery, Part The Eleventh / Cops: Lake Austin / Tyranny of the Majority or Will of the People: Constitutionalism in the New Millennium / My Longing For Russell Shepard: A Diary of Rejected Love.

Um, it's only May. We've labored together through the nuclear winter of the offseason three times before, and will again, but today's lively discussion of favored Austin eateries reminded me of a comment from Mr. Mayer over a year ago about there being a place for off topic banter on BON.

I definitely agree, but only with a few ground rules:

First, though I'll meander off topic on the front page from time to time, the vast majority of content will remain sports-centric, if not outright Longhorn-centric.

Second, there are topics which remain expressly forbidden. Religion and politics are the keystones here, but use common sense in imagining others to which the underlying rule will apply. As a rule of thumb, if people will embarrass themselves on cable news shows to scream about it, I really, really don't wanna see it here. Take your global warming exists/doesn't exist fight elsewhere. This site is for the trivial (read: enjoyable) side of life.

Third, and relatedly, let's not make this an advice/unload your mind board. Talk freely about topics of relevance to the general Longhorn reader, but I can't bear to see a string of threads from people asking for advice on which HDTV is the best to buy. Or whether they should tell their wives that they're screwing around. If you've spent time on any big message board, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Keep it germane to general interest. Work out the rest of your life's challenges elsewhere.

On a parting note, if you're wondering why this needs to be spelled out, I beg of you to stay innocent, my child. Do not stray out and into the internet wilderness.

Over and out... I hadn't realized quite how exhausted I am. Certainly too tired to go hunt for news. 'Til tomorrow.