The days are beginning to bleed together now. Like a strung out junkie on the streets of Waco, Texas (don’t kid yourself, just look around), you’re not sure what time it is, where you are exactly, or what it is you were supposed to get done today. That light at the end of the tunnel remains, but embraces your sporting loins with a sparkle of hope each weekend, tickling the yen that is in fact an adverse addiction to college football. The wiser of options might be to keep yourself busy with stuff like actual work or frantic vacuuming, dog washing, parenting, etc. But in the midst of survival, a balance must be had. Certain things must be taken care of to function properly; when one or many of these things go unattended to, bad things happen. This is basic psychology:
Wednesdays suck. We’re here to support each other. Onward.
Highlights from WEEK 3:
Southern Miss 31, Kansas 16
Kansas continues to establish itself as a confused teenager, struggling to find her true identity. As with any prepubescent going through changes, just when things were looking up and we found ourselves a QB – you can’t tell me what to do! I hate you!
#12 Arkansas 31, Georgia 24
#20 Michigan 42, Massachusetts 37
↑ This guy has 559 yards rushing and 671 yards passing, totaling 1,230 yards through 3 games. This is 6.37 times his body weight, which will hopefully be enough to carry an entire team and the employment of one head coach through December.
Georgia Tech 30, North Carolina 24
Commence annual self-destruction of the ACC.
1 Alabama 62, Duke 13
Introducing the new Duke head football coach:
#7 Oklahoma 27, Air Force 24
Week 1: HahahaOUsuxhahahabobstoopsha; Week 2: Oh shit, what is this?; Week 3: Awesome, so we have no idea what to expect then.
#8 Nebraska 56, Washington 21
[thinking of a good Pelini joke]
#10 Florida 31, Tennessee 17
Just let me know when it’s okay to make a bitter remark about the SEC having a down year.
#18 USC 32, Minnesota 21
I hope I am able to post this all year long (yes, he did it again).
Texas A&M 27, Florida International 20
A 4th quarter, 21 point rally in one of the most depressing games ever.
#3 Boise State 51, Wyoming 6
Michigan State 34, Notre Dame 31
I shouldn’t give this any more publicity, but because you needed less faith in humanity today, you can have this guy sum it up. Oh yeah, and it was as glorious as a game can get (sorry Em).
Key Match-Ups for WEEK 4:
Thurs, 6:30 PM CT #19 Miami (FL) @ Pittsburgh - ESPN
Prediction: Miami - 38, Pitt - 24
Sat, 2:30 PM CT #1 Alabama @ #10 Arkansas - CBS
Prediction: Bama – 20, Ark – 17
2:30 PM CT #16 Stanford @ Notre Dame - NBC
Prediction: Stanford – 34, ND – 10
5:00 PM CT #8 Oklahoma @ Cincinnati – ESPN2
Prediction: OU – 42, Cincy – 31
6:45 PM CT #12 South Carolina @ #17 Auburn - ESPN
Prediction: USC – 35, Auburn – 24
7:00 PM CT #24 Oregon State @ #3 Boise State - ABC
Prediction: OSU – 14, BSU – 41
8:00 PM CT #22 West Virginia @ #15 LSU
Prediction: WVU – 22, LSU – 20