FanPost

The Season in Rock

Once upon a time PB nominated me this site's resident music critic. Who am I to argue with the boss?

As I look back on 2011, I can't help but thinking my twin obsessions had remarkably similar years. The New York Times called this past year "The Year Rock Just Spun Its Wheels" and I can't agree more. And those of us who love college football were forced to justify a year of coaching scandals, infighting, greed, immorality, and a regular reason rendered meaningless by a system of determining a champion that is the worst among American sports.

Here, then, is your Season in Rock.

MAN OF THE YEAR:

KANYE WEST = LES MILES

You may not like him but he gets results.

Kanye is not a rapper's rapper. But as a producer he's a master molder of talent, and he's working with the best: Jay-Z. (See here where he samples Otis Redding from 2011's Watch the Throne.) But it's hard to believe someone who acts like such an idiot sometimes can be so good at his job. Looks good in a baseball hat.

Les Miles has built a machine around a spectacular talent and kept it humming. But it's hard to believe someone who acts like such an idiot sometimes can be so good at his job. Looks good in a baseball hat.

PERFORMER OF THE YEAR:

ADELE = ROBERT GRIFFIN III

Came out of nowhere with the performance of the year.

This was the song of the year and it wasn't even close. She'll clean up at the Grammys and she's got a hell of a career ahead of her. Your girlfriend loves her.

We all saw what this guy could do. He took home the Heisman and has a hell of a career ahead of him. Your girlfriend loves him.

C'MON, REALLY... THESE GUYS AGAIN?

COLDPLAY = ALABAMA

Same review for both = Everybody hates these cocksuckers. They get all the breaks and don't deserve it.


WORST PERFORMANCE OF THE YEAR:

METALLICA = TEXAS A&M

Nobody shit the bed more spectacularly than these guys.


Oh Metallica, what have you done? Back in the day, you had some success. Did some good things. And then you started believing you were bigger than you really were, and started alienating your incredibly devoted fan base. And then there's this, your unlistenable collaboration with Lou Reed, which made you into a joke.

Oh Aggies, what have you done? Back in the day, you had some success. Did some good things. And then you started believing you were bigger than you really were, and started alienating your incredibly devoted fan base. And then there's this, which is scoreboard for all time and forever. PS you were always a joke.


HOPE FOR THE FUTURE:

TEXAS = THE BLACK KEYS

Representing all that is good and true.

The Black Keys are two dudes from Akron, OH. They make rock music the way it used to be made. In the 60s and 70s, when it was made right. They've had better albums before, but their newest, "El Camino" is still one of the best albums of the year. (I'll post my other picks in the comments.)

The keys to the Longhorns future are in the hands of two men: Bryan Harsin and Manny Diaz. Meanwhile, Mack Brownhas always envisioned returning Texas football to the days of Darrell Royal. In the 60s and 70s, when it was played right. They've had better years, but I believe this team has a bright future.

All comments, FanPosts, and FanShots are the views of the reader-authors who create them.

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

Join Burnt Orange Nation

You must be a member of Burnt Orange Nation to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Burnt Orange Nation. You should read them.

Join Burnt Orange Nation

You must be a member of Burnt Orange Nation to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Burnt Orange Nation. You should read them.

Spinner

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9347_tracker