What Would You Do For One More Year?

by PB @ BON on Mar 20, 2007 7:22 PM CDT in Basketball Comment 134 comments

I teased this up prior to Texas' exit to the tourney, noting it would have to wait until we were officially eliminated. Sadly, that day is here too soon, but it does mean we can start to make our KD Promises.

Here's how this will work. You make a promise - to yourself and to BON: "If Kevin Durant returns to Texas for another year, I will ____"

Simple as that. Think it over, make a promise, stick it in the comment section as a matter of public record. If it's something verifiable with photo evidence - all the better.

Now, as a matter of note - you don't have to promise anything ridiculous (though you should). It could be as simple as, upon arriving at your office, screaming: "I LOVE KEVIN DURANT!" That would work. Still, think big here. We would edit that promise to going into your office and yelling, "I LOVE KEVIN DURANT! SO MUCH SO THAT I'M NOT WEARING UNDERPANTS TODAY! SEE?!"

You get the idea. Think of it like Kevin Durant Lent. You make a little sacrifice for a shot at redemption.

I'll go first. If Kevin Durant returns to Texas for another year, I'll watch 10 WNBA games in one season. . .

Okay, no, I'm not willing to do that. Here's what I will do, though. If KD announces he's returning, I'll make 20 t-shirts that read, "I Sold My Soul For One More Year Of Kevin Durant" and give 'em away to the first twenty BON'ers who make a (verifiable) KD pledge below.

Leave your KD promise in the comment section below, and email all your friends and urge them to do the same. We'll keep this post hovering near the top of the page at all times. Make your deal with the devil, starting now.

--PB--

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By the way

Even if you're not the TBone crazy type, you should pledge to do something. Maybe you didn't attend a single game this year, and you pledge to attend three next season. Whatever it is - make a pledge. Support Kevin's return.

--PB--

by PB @ BON on Mar 20, 2007 2:00 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

That's a good idea

If Durant comes back next year, I pledge to go to at least one game at the Erwin Center. Since I live in Columbus, Ohio, that's no small task. You may not know this, but aside from one weekend in each of the last two Septembers, you just can't get to Austin from Columbus. But I'll find a way. Mark it down now.

by horneye on Mar 23, 2007 11:54 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns for another year

of basketball at Texas, I'll donate $50.00 to whatever the "Official Watering Hole of BON is in Austin" to be used at PB's descretion...

Just Remember, No Matter What Happens, ou SUCKS.

by ouALWAYSsux on Mar 20, 2007 2:05 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

I wonder if PHF has a watering hole in England?

Just Remember, No Matter What Happens, ou SUCKS.

by ouALWAYSsux on Mar 20, 2007 2:07 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Love it

We'll have a KD tailgate party outside the Erwin Center. We'll invite media, dance around the Erwin Center like crazy aliens, chanting things like "We're not worthy! We're not worthy!"

--PB--

by PB @ BON on Mar 20, 2007 2:09 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

f-ing LOL

Just Remember, No Matter What Happens, ou SUCKS.

by ouALWAYSsux on Mar 20, 2007 2:10 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns to Texas for another year,

I will...
Scream the eyes at the top of my lungs from my cubicle. Also, I will work for the rest of my life to incorporate Kevin Durant's name or picture into the spacecraft I work on.

Kevin,
You want to talk legacy, how about the Durant Space Telescope, or the KD Mars rover? Despite what you saw in Space Jam, even Jordan has not made it to space. Think about it.

by Wells on Mar 20, 2007 2:07 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Effing Awesome

Woo NASA perks!

--PB--

by PB @ BON on Mar 20, 2007 2:08 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Just curious

How often does Nasa actually design a new spacecraft? I assume there are several prototypes that never see flight time or are not even introduced to the public. But I haven't been made aware of a new design in my recent memory.

Sounds like one of those interesting bits the public rarely hears about.

by BrooklynHorn on Mar 20, 2007 2:23 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Not as easy as a number

NASA has multiple centers all over the country competing for government dollars (one NASA my ass) and each of those centers has space missions in all phases (design, launch, mission).

Also, at each center there is research that is being conducted that is not directly related to the missions. NASA also funds research and design work at Universities and Businesses around the country.

We also partner with other government agencies (DoD, DoE, ect) and space programs around the world (we are still pretty much funding the Russian space program so their knowledge base does not go to rouge nations for work).

If you want to see a glossy overview of all of the missions that they want to tell you about, here is the NASA missions website:
http://www.nasa.gov/missions/highlights/index.html

For a more in-depth review of what is going on at NASA, the budget request is a good place to start:
http://www.nasa.gov/pdf/168652main_NASA_FY08_Budget_Request.pdf

For a more critical review of what NASA does, check this site out:
http://www.nasawatch.com/

If you want to know more, get my email from PB and I can answer you questions with more depth.

by Wells on Mar 20, 2007 2:56 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Awesome.

Thanks

by BrooklynHorn on Mar 20, 2007 3:00 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns to Texas for one more year...

I will not drink a single alcoholic beverage for an entire year.

OK, I don't drink. That's not fair.

I will sponsor a car pool from the DFW area to the Drum for 3 games (and I can't bring everyone - There's only so much room in a mom-mobile).

by GoHorns on Mar 20, 2007 2:19 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns to Texas for another year,

I will attempt to convince my future wife that our first son's name should be Kevin Durant Collins rather than Vincent Young Collins. (NB: I have yet to convince her on the Vince Young idea.)

Also, I will attend at least one game next year, if not three.

Most frighteningly, I will tell the next Aggie or Sooner I meet that they are a fine, upstanding person that attended a very respectable institution of higher learning. And I will not vomit on them.

So take that.

by Kahuna on Mar 20, 2007 2:19 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

"And I will not vomit on them."

Come on. It has to be reasonable.

by GoHorns on Mar 20, 2007 2:20 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Hell Kah, I'll double my

$50.00 to $100.00 if you retract:

"Most frighteningly, I will tell the next Aggie or Sooner I meet that they are a fine, upstanding person that attended a very respectable institution of higher learning. And I will not vomit on them."

Just Remember, No Matter What Happens, ou SUCKS.

by ouALWAYSsux on Mar 20, 2007 2:30 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant Comes Back For Next Year

I will set off fireworks inside the city limits.

They're adults. They're allowed to have fun whenever they want. We're kids, we're supposed to work.

by Vice President Coco on Mar 20, 2007 2:28 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

My Pledge

If Durant comes back, I will buy a dog, name him Kevin Durant, and force him to watch Air Bud repeatedly for three years. At that time, I will challenge the human Kevin Durant to a 1 on 1 basketball game with dog Kevin Durant. It will be the most epic 1 on 1 basketball match ever played. Win or lose, both Kevin Durants will go down as legendary players in a historic interspecies battle for hoops supremecy that will be remembered for ages.

by Meekrob on Mar 20, 2007 2:31 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns for another year

I will propose to Carley Barnes (or Rick if he'll have me).

More importantly, Kevin will take his rightful place in Burnt Orange infamy.

Kevin, Earl, Ricky and Vince. The Four Cattlemen of the Texocalypse.

by nematode on Mar 20, 2007 2:32 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns for another year

I will decorate my place of work with I sold my soul for a KD T-shirt and Poor Aggies Posters - Note: My workplace is owned and operated by aggies.

~Stefan~

by stefancl on Mar 20, 2007 2:35 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Why wait?

You should already be decorating your place of work with Poor Aggie Posters. At least tell me you've got some Pro-Longhorn memorabilia on your desk or on the walls.

Hook 'em Horns

by LonghornWSO on Mar 20, 2007 11:52 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns

I will were Texas Longhorn underwear for a month straight not changing them, at this time, I will sniff them every mourning when I wake up and before i go to bed. Giving my pledge to honor the great KD.

by Rigger on Mar 20, 2007 2:40 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

There is no questioning your fandom

Cats and dogs sleeping together.

by EYESofBEVO on Mar 20, 2007 2:42 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

I'll hold off on my idea

of naming my next dog "Major" (sometime this year)-- and instead call him "Durant".

The next homebrew contest I enter the name of the beer will be "Kevy D's 3-Point Porter" or "K-Smooth Ale".

Cats and dogs sleeping together.

by EYESofBEVO on Mar 20, 2007 2:40 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

How can I get my hands

on some K-smooth ale?

by Wells on Mar 20, 2007 2:58 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Kevin Durant Highway

If Kevin Durant stays for another season of Texas Basketball, I will start a petition to rename the section of IH-35 running past campus, especially the Drum, as Kevin Durant Highway. This should be agreeable to the Highway department, since they won't have to change the number.

Come to think of it, we should petition to change the entire stretch of IH-10 that runs through our great state as Vince Young Highway.

by the usual suspects on Mar 20, 2007 2:42 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

THAT is an awesome idea

And Aggies the world over will shit themselves. The great thing is, the Vince Young Highway would extend from sea to shining sea, all the way to LA, where it would run just 2 blocks north of the USC campus.

Hook 'em Horns

by LonghornWSO on Mar 21, 2007 12:00 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

I'm all for the Vince Young Highway

Especially considering you need to take the 10 to get to the USC campus.

by CaliWolverine on Mar 21, 2007 12:46 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant stays...

I will play the Aggie War Hymn on my trombone. The very idea makes me shudder. This is something that I can document, and is the most sacriligious sacrifice I can think of.

by hornbone on Mar 20, 2007 2:46 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Returns

I will wear a KD jersey to every Celtics-Sixers game next year to mock their inabilities to win Kevin over with pathetic offereings of money and hookers.

by BrooklynHorn on Mar 20, 2007 2:47 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

We have a winner.

Take that Ainge you assmonkey.

The degree says TCU, but the heart says "Hook 'em"

by TCU Horn Fan on Mar 20, 2007 4:53 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

if KD returns...

I will promptly leave NYC, move home to austin and show up drunk for every home game KD plays in.

I'll do it.

My future is on the line.

by bklynBEVO on Mar 20, 2007 2:49 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

i can only assume

that you think there's 0% chance of his actually returning...

...bleeding burnt orange in nyc since 2002

by cwofford on Mar 20, 2007 3:48 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If KD Returns..

I will make a poster and call it the "The Return."

by bachelorette on Mar 20, 2007 3:04 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns......

I will goto every home game and wear a shirt that states...."Number 35 in your program, but Number 1 in your hearts. Kevin Durant!!!"

by RadLonghorn on Mar 20, 2007 3:04 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns...

I'll quit subjecting BON readers to beauty pageant references, forever.

Yeah, I'm that serious.

And I will also start a "Suck it Celtics" email campaign in which 1,000's of Longhorn fans email a picture of KD to Bill Simmons every day with a recording from Borat that says, "hey retard, you ain't ever gonna get dis. No, you never gonna get dis."

Be nobody but yourself in a world that desperately wants you to be like everybody else.

by 54b on Mar 20, 2007 3:04 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

You broke my laptop

Dr Pepper -everywhere-

--PB--

by PB @ BON on Mar 20, 2007 3:06 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

And I thought I was serious!!!

Just Remember, No Matter What Happens, ou SUCKS.

by ouALWAYSsux on Mar 20, 2007 3:14 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Winner

That's awesome.

by CW on Mar 20, 2007 4:21 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant Returns

I will:
-Somehow find room in a state clerkship salary for season tickets
-Coordinate with fellow BON readers to get a line of seats together
-Offer up our pianted chests on game days as a chalkboard for ANY message that BON wishes to send to opponents

The message could including anything from your run of the mill "OU sucks," to "KD: We're not worthy," to an impressionist mosaic of KD posterizing someone ... whatever. Point is - it'll be big, orange, and up front.

by 3llonghorn on Mar 20, 2007 3:14 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Outstanding

--PB--

by PB @ BON on Mar 20, 2007 3:14 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

my pledge

i can't seem to find an 07-08 basketball schedule (probably hasn't been finalized yet), but if Kevin Durant and Texas come up to New York to play any games next year, I will host and pay for (as much as I can on my measly corporate lawyer salary....) a BON get together and drink-a-thon for whoever can come up for the game.

alternatively, if they don't come up to new york next year, I will take a road (or, more likely air) trip to see them play somewhere else, probably Austin.

by billyzane on Mar 20, 2007 3:28 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

you stole my roadtrip idea

but the NYC-BON get together is a great idea.

...bleeding burnt orange in nyc since 2002

by cwofford on Mar 20, 2007 3:49 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

NYC

If the Horns do well enough in their November tournament, I think they get two games in NYC or somewhere in NJ that is close enough to be considered NYC. East Rutherford, I suppose.

by LonghornRoadTrip on Mar 21, 2007 4:39 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

too bad that...

every time i see the horns play at the garden or the meadowlands, they lose/play like crap.

...bleeding burnt orange in nyc since 2002

by cwofford on Mar 21, 2007 10:33 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Yeah...

I've seen them play 4 times here in NYC, and they've lost all but one of them. They also lost all the games they played here that I couldn't make it to. I think we're like 1-6 in the 5 years I've been in NY. What is that?

by BrooklynHorn on Mar 21, 2007 10:40 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

ditto

I have a commitment to the truth.

by steezy on Mar 21, 2007 11:05 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Returns...

...I'll help make it easier for his family to attend his games by letting them stay in a $750,000 home rent-free. But if he doesn't sign with me as his agent, I may have to go public and force the NCAA to hold an investigation that will result in neither Kevin losing any trophies nor UT losing any scholarships. To make sure that there is a lot of righteous indignation yet no closure, the NCAA will wisely select otherwise-out-of-a-job Mike Nifong to head up the cause. I'll even add two extra guest bedrooms to the home, for whenever Danny Ainge and Michael Jordan want to sleep over. If Kevin returns, I'll also root for the Spurs to tank their season and stock up on lottery balls.

by Lincoln on Mar 20, 2007 3:29 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Returns...

As a DC Longhorn, the least I could do is drive out to Suitland, MD and mow Momma Durant's lawn a few times this summer.

by Drinking the Orange Kool Aid on Mar 20, 2007 3:38 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

nice though, but

i think that might be an NCAA violation. you'd have to wait until after he went pro (and not promise her anything beforehand) and then go mow her lawn as a thank you.

as a side note, the NCAA is retarded.

by billyzane on Mar 20, 2007 3:44 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Crap

Do they make Durant Jerseys that will fit the Lincoln Statue?

by Drinking the Orange Kool Aid on Mar 20, 2007 4:18 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Mow

shit, I would landscape it to rival the gardens at Versailles, as long as that is not a violation of NCAA rules.

by Wells on Mar 20, 2007 3:46 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Durant comes back...

I will finally be able to convince my wife to let me paint my one year old daughters face burnt orange while she wears a UT cheerleader outfit during the first foorball game of the season. This might take me not talking to her for a significant period of time to make it work, but I will.

by tparr on Mar 20, 2007 3:48 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

if kevin durant comes back for a 2nd year at TX...

... i will sign and date all my official business correspondence like so:

"March 20th, 0002 K.D."

because that's when things really started to matter.

...bleeding burnt orange in nyc since 2002

by cwofford on Mar 20, 2007 3:52 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Sure I'll play

If Kevin Durant comes back for one more year, I'll wear my Burnt Orange Nation T-Shirt to a Penn State home game. Don't say I never did anything for ya.

Mike

Black Shoe Diaries

by PSUMike on Mar 20, 2007 3:53 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

now we're getting somewhere...

by billyzane on Mar 20, 2007 3:55 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

you can't bill BON

for your medical bills though. Clause has to be included.

Horns up, Okies Down.

by kicker on Mar 20, 2007 6:10 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Returns...

I'll dye one of my aggie friend's hair burnt orange while he's passed out drunk. wait, that sounds like a pretty funny idea anyway.

by greenman on Mar 20, 2007 3:58 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Retire

If KD comes back, I will petition the University to retire his number in Basketball, baseball, swimming, track, golf...well everything but football.

Also, the tower should remain lit up in orange up to and for at least a month after the Horns win the Tournament.

And $1 orange beers after every game! Maybe Live Oak can come up with the K-smooth ale mentioned earlier??

Hook Em!

by Margaritaking on Mar 20, 2007 4:33 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns...

I will wear a <$150 rental bevo-looking costume sporting #35 to the first regular season home bball game and attempt to get on the court until:

a)I get to dance with the pom girls during a time-out,
b)KD gives me a five, up-high, down-low
c)I get physically escorted out of the arena,
d)I get booed off the court.

by jimmer on Mar 20, 2007 5:17 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD considers returning

I'll send him football cards of Matt Leinhart which will remind him that Leinhart was drafted 11th, not 1st.

by krazieman on Mar 20, 2007 6:08 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns, ...

I will wear my BON t-shirt to 5 Trailblazer games and heckle Aldridge to the tune of "All Your Records Are Belong to KD!!!"

P.S. Sitting through 5 entire Trailblazer games is the difficult part here...

by oregonlonghorn on Mar 20, 2007 7:05 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Durant stays for one more year,

I promise to light myself on fire and run through down town Austin* proclaiming, "Kevin Durant is the next Kevin Durant!!!"

*I would also do this in downtown OKC and College Station&

&Does College Station even have a downtown? Or is it just a sheep/cow store?

by bamfor on Mar 20, 2007 8:13 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Hmmm ...

Well, I'm currently pregnant. Don't know yet if it's a boy or girl. I already have a girl's name picked out, but not a boy's name. Kevin is starting to look pretty good.

Regardless, I can pledge that I will come to at least 4 games (rather than 2 this year) from my home in DFW. And considering that I'll be a mom nursing an infant (not to mention chasing a k-gartener), that's a hell of a pledge.

by EddieTheAlbinoSquirrel on Mar 20, 2007 8:14 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Pledge of the day

The pregnant name pledge + DFW caravan. Outstanding.

--PB--

by PB @ BON on Mar 20, 2007 8:17 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

No rush on the baby

If "Kevin" isn't here yet, the stomach will be perfect for our BON painted chest section!

Good luck!

by 3llonghorn on Mar 20, 2007 8:30 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

i pledge

that if you name your kid kevin (or, what the hell, Vince), I will start a BON community-sponsored diaper fund and donate the first $100.

that's the dedication we need here people!

by billyzane on Mar 20, 2007 9:00 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns...

...I will make a burnt orange T-shirt with the outline of a right fist beating the left side of the chest, wear it in the O-Zone for a few games, and beat my own chest after every KD dunk next season.

That's KD's number-one celebration...I wish there was a Youtube clip of all the KD fist-to-chest beatings...

by txtwstr7 on Mar 20, 2007 8:21 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns I will...

...get tickets to the home games, college station game and the NCAA championship. I would say "even if Texas isn't in the NCAA championship" but that would imply someone will be able to stop him from averaging 46 pts in the 2008 tournament. This could seriously turn Texas into a Top 3 destination for nationwide hoops talent.

by houstonrules on Mar 20, 2007 8:24 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Hey if Maravich can average 45 a season

KD can average 46 in 6 straight games

by bamfor on Mar 20, 2007 9:35 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns I will...

Stop drinking on weekdays...

For a couple months

by aorist9 on Mar 20, 2007 10:10 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Durant returns...

I will shave KD in my chest hair.

--AW--

by awiggo on Mar 20, 2007 11:59 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

You must post pictures

You should just shave please stay right now.

by Wells on Mar 21, 2007 8:44 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

One more time

I stick with the quote I gave Andy Katz. If KD comes back for another year, I will find a way to be here for another year, too. Longhorn Road Trip: Year Two.

by LonghornRoadTrip on Mar 21, 2007 4:42 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If I return ...

I will score over 20 double doubles ...
I will have a career-high 48 points in a Big 12 Championship victory ...
I will have 14 30-point games ...
and I will lead the Longhorns to the Final Four ...
at least.

by KDurant35 on Mar 21, 2007 9:12 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

I have no doubt ...

... that every one of those promises would come true.

by EddieTheAlbinoSquirrel on Mar 21, 2007 10:10 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Starburst

KD, I would give you a pack of Starburst for that 48 -point performance. Of course, the NCAA would then take away 8 scholarships...all for a pack of candy less than a dollar. Freakin NCAA.

by LonghornRoadTrip on Mar 21, 2007 1:40 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Since my previous idea is against NCAA regs...

I will show up to the next large-scale anti-war protest on the Mall here in DC wearing a KD jersey and carrying a sign that tells the NBA to "stop drafting our babies!" I will accept ideas for pro-KD chants that sound vaguely like anti-war chants which I will attempt to start among the hippies.

by Drinking the Orange Kool Aid on Mar 21, 2007 9:23 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Nice

Let me know when, I will join in.

by Wells on Mar 21, 2007 9:47 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

ME TOO!

I have a commitment to the truth.

by steezy on Mar 21, 2007 10:02 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Like

"all we are saying is give KD a chance?"

by billb on Mar 21, 2007 10:08 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

Or...

Impeach Commissioner Stern

I have a commitment to the truth.

by steezy on Mar 21, 2007 10:37 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

"Hell no - he won't go"

"We've found the weapon of mass destruction!"

by 3llonghorn on Mar 21, 2007 11:21 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

chant:

ho ho. hey hey. KD has got to stay.

by billyzane on Mar 21, 2007 11:39 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

or "ho ho hey hey no way NBA"

BZ, is this copyright infringement on my part.

Just Remember, No Matter What Happens, ou SUCKS.

by ouALWAYSsux on Mar 21, 2007 4:49 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns...

I will finally suck it up and pay the money to become a life member...

by the1austin on Mar 21, 2007 9:50 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Life Membership

You should do this regardless. All BONers should. Kevin should too except that his Ex designation has to wait.

I never will forget ol' what's-his-name.

by Horntod on Mar 21, 2007 10:52 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

What I'll do if KD does NOT return

I've been thinking about my pledge, and have come up empty.

But if Kevin decides to go pro, I will drive my new VMoto Milan scooter (in red) to Rockville, MD, to the home of Wayne and Wanda. I will have dynamite strapped to my chest and will hold them hostage until they make another baby. This baby shall be named Kevin Returns Durant, and he will attend the University of Texas beginning in the year 2025.

It's a long time to wait, I realize, but it will be totally worth it...am I right or am I right? Right.

I have a commitment to the truth.

by steezy on Mar 21, 2007 10:07 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Our first hostage threat!

The stakes are RAISED!

--PB--

by PB @ BON on Mar 21, 2007 10:23 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

ya'll are killin me...........

gotta feeling this has taken on a life of its own. Unbelievable creativity on this site, as always.

Just Remember, No Matter What Happens, ou SUCKS.

by ouALWAYSsux on Mar 21, 2007 11:46 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

im still laughing...........

Just Remember, No Matter What Happens, ou SUCKS.

by ouALWAYSsux on Mar 21, 2007 11:47 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

WOW

40 seconds straight?! You animal!!

by GoHorns on Mar 21, 2007 12:47 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If KD stays...

I will not even acknowledge that I graduated from TCU on September 8th.

The degree says TCU, but the heart says "Hook 'em"

by TCU Horn Fan on Mar 21, 2007 11:05 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

I'll keep it realistic

If KD returns, I WILL buy an Authentic KD jersey and attend all home games in 2008. Included with attending games is getting drunk and losing my voice.

by roywilliamsisgod on Mar 21, 2007 12:12 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

my turn, different approach

give a little, get a lot.....

If Kevin Durant returns for his sophomore year, I promise to watch all those "Top" shows with my girlfriend when she watches them:
"America's Next Top Model"
"Top Chef" (not too bad anyway)
and most painfully "Top Design"

I am willing to give up those 3 hours a week for K Smooth to return

...til Gabriel blows his horn

by BigTexBD on Mar 21, 2007 12:42 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD Returns to Austin . . .

I pledge to remove my tattoo of Dave Bliss and have it replaced with a University of Texas Longhorn symbol above my butt crack . . .

. . . oh wait, KD is GOING PRO!

[Please don't hold me to my pledge if I am wrong.]

Sic 'Em? Why the hell not?

by BearMeat on Mar 21, 2007 1:47 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin returns I pledge to...

Start going to church again, stop drinking so much beer and get a real job so I can afford to drive up from the coast for at least one conference home game!

Thursday, November 30, 1893

by fury17deco on Mar 21, 2007 1:48 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin returns I will...

eat my foot.

by Caradoc on Mar 21, 2007 2:28 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns...

I will ensure that all pledges posted here are carried out to their fullest extent (especially BearMeat's).

In addition, I will go ahead and purchase that 52" LCD HD TV I have been eyeing so I can appropriately chronicle "The Second Coming." This will undoubtedly set me back in the whole `buying-an-engagement-ring-and-finally-proposing-to-my girlfriend' thing, but she will understand, right?

Sacrifices must be made so that the dream may live on...

by Useful Idiot on Mar 21, 2007 2:31 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Shall I email KD a link to all these crazy love

Not sure if against those dumb ass NCAA rules, which I highly doubt, and I am hoping horn fans have good judgements, but his email can be easily found on UT page so I wonder if we shall make him aware of all this crazy fan support.

seatpleasant35 is the ID, I say he is way too humble with a screen like that.

Go Horns!!

by philly horn on Mar 21, 2007 2:53 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns

I'll be so ultra super pissed that I will eat an entire frisbee.

by Red Blooded on Mar 21, 2007 3:09 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD comes back for one more.....

Since I don't have any hair on my head anyway, I pledge to paint #35 in Burnt Orange on my bald knob for all the UT games.

UT59

by UT59 on Mar 21, 2007 3:34 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

if kd comes back another year...

i will start a religion devoted to kevin durant. just kidding.
if he comes back i will go to UT for college if the school accepts me. i'm from nj so it would be harder for me to get in.

TEXAS LONGHORNS

by clra2 on Mar 21, 2007 4:39 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Durantism?

I'm in.

by jc25 on Mar 21, 2007 5:16 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

allegedly L. Ron Hubbard once said:

"the quickest way to make a million dollars is to start a religion."

sounds like a sweet way to finance your education.

by billyzane on Mar 21, 2007 5:57 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

if kd comes back next year I will...

go to all the Columbia University football games and not laugh at their pathetic excuse for a football team.

I will also not voice my regrets - for the whole football and basketball season - at not choosing to attend UT.

by 4th generation fan on Mar 21, 2007 8:29 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns I will...

take a vow of celibacy until the longhorns home opener.

This way I can be born again into Durantism.

by ctex80 on Mar 21, 2007 9:22 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns next year...

I will only jerk off to my Jessica Alba poster twice a day... instead of the normal four times.

VY : Football :: KD : Basketball

by goingforthecorner on Mar 21, 2007 9:23 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD comes back . . .

I will go to every tournament game amd name my first child Durant.

Hook 'em

by TarHorn on Mar 22, 2007 8:20 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

build a life size model of atchley

made out of old newspapers that can be hit like a pinata
instead of hitting the real atchley at timeouts
hell even conner can partake

by abcdmetrius on Mar 22, 2007 8:44 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns

My first born child regardless of sex will have the middle name Durant!

by The Senator on Mar 22, 2007 9:23 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

I will fire my lawn guy

That way I can Mow "KD" in the lawn; this has the added bonus that it will really piss off the Home Owners Association, but will not be in violation of any by laws (F***ing Nazis).

by billb on Mar 22, 2007 10:09 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

IF....

1. If I am still in Austin and KD returns:
I will go to at least the A&M and Baylor road games and will attend every home game. I went to 80% last year and the Baylor road game so if you read this Kevin - I was there.

2. If I am not in Austin and KD returns:
I might just have to move back to Austin, but will at least make it to 1 home game and 1 road game (preferably a pre-season tourney).

I think the BON authors need to do more than make some shirts and shave their chest hair. How about some road game attendance pledges...?

Crystal Balls

by MMHorns on Mar 22, 2007 10:26 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

In addition to printing t-shirts

I will depart the frozen tundra of South Bend for at least four K-Smooth tilts - home or away. . . wherever I can.

I further pledge to attend all the tournament games in Little Rock, Houstoon, and as Kevin cuts down the nets in San Antonio.

So help me God.

--PB--

by PB @ BON on Mar 22, 2007 10:43 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

That's more like it

I guess in your mind those were unsaid pledges, but it is good to hear you say them nonetheless.

Wow - just thinking about going to some more road games and watching KD and all the boys back together gives me goosebumps.

Crystal Balls

by MMHorns on Mar 22, 2007 1:59 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns for more dominance

I will immediately email any and all sportswriters who find it necessary to criticize his decision.

Included in the emails will definitely be plenty of hate for the haters, but also a link to this list to show that part of Durant's reason for return was the incredible love he gets from the University and all Lonhorn fans.

by horns world order on Mar 22, 2007 11:00 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns for one more year

I will take my girlfriend to at least one home game of Texas football, basketball (men and women), and one random sport of her choice within the next year and I will finally propose to her in front of Bevo at the football game. This is a real pledge as we both currently live in Ohio and would have to travel for this.

by texas ex ohio on Mar 22, 2007 11:36 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns...

I'll wear an "I Sold My Soul for One More Year of KD" shirt to every home game next season AND will drag my girlfriend to at least three of those games. (One is easy, two is pushing it, but by the third, she'll be refusing outright--so this is a real pledge.)

by a0nyme on Mar 22, 2007 1:11 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns

I'll make it to at least one home game, and drag as many longhorn friends to the A&M game in college station and (assuming they make it three years in a row) whatever game they've got going on at the Toyota Center in Houston. oh, and i'll for sure jump on the first available regional tickets for next year's Sweet 16 in Houston.

i haven't been to a game at the Drum since i graduated and i've never been to B/CS for a game of any sort. and i'm on mid-level consulting engineer salary, so this isn't THAT minor of a commitment (especially the Sweet 16 tickets).

by littlevisigoth on Mar 22, 2007 1:13 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns...

I will buy his signature shoe and apparel for myself, my kids and (later) my grandkids when he finally goes pro.

I will instruct my extended family and friends to do the same.

by mldatx on Mar 22, 2007 1:56 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD Returns...

I wont watch a single NBA game until he enters the league.

by longhornadam on Mar 22, 2007 2:02 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns....

I'll drink less during basketball games because I wont need to knowing He's in there.

by the other Andrew on Mar 22, 2007 2:04 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns...

I WON'T have to fly around the world, turning back time by reversing the rotation of the earth (in effect, REWINDING HISTORY!!), so I can rewrite the NCAA rule book and make it a 2 year requirement before players can enter the NBA. That would be exhausting.

I'd also wear my official Dick Vitale hand held mask (autographed!) they handed out at Midnight Madness years ago every time they Horn's play.

What Would Jamaal Charles Do

by WWJCD on Mar 22, 2007 3:26 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns...

I will fly to Austin from my home in San Diego to see a basketball game next year. I usually do this once a year for football only....

by brentmcd on Mar 22, 2007 4:17 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant Comes Back for One More Year...

I will actually follow the NBA--closely--as a fan of Kevin's team, for the duration of his career. I will buy said team's apparel. I will watch games from beginning to end. I will care about outcomes even when many of the players themselves clearly do not (KD, of course, excluded).

I will even learn which teams are in which divisons.

by wao23 on Mar 22, 2007 4:23 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

if Kevin Durant returns...

I will paint my guitar burnt orange and light it on fire, on stage, like Jimi Hendrix.... wearing a UT basketball jersey... as a sacrifice to the Basketball Gods.

by SelimSivad on Mar 22, 2007 4:54 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

if Kevin Durnat returns

I will carve out K.D. in my chest hair. 40 year old virgin style.

by EEhorns on Mar 22, 2007 5:17 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Durant returns ...

I will ascend to the top of the Empire State Building, clad in burnt orange and number 35, turn my face to the southwest, raise my horns to the heavens and sing "The Eyes of Texas."
I will buy a round for every joker in whatever bar I happen to be in when I see a UT/KD victory.
I will contribute $1 toward KD's $14 million, 2007-08 matching fund (take that, NBA!)

by NYCHorn on Mar 22, 2007 9:13 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If Kevin Stays

I promise to purchase season tickets and go to every home game. Even if that means sitting next to a bunch of old alumni that can barely stand up during an exciting game.

by JCHudson on Mar 23, 2007 6:37 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD stays..

I pledge to go to every home game wearing a KD shirt, maybe I'll even dye my hair orange

by apagne on Mar 23, 2007 9:35 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

if he stays

I will wear my i (heart) KD shirt every day to class

by blazzinken on Mar 23, 2007 4:42 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns for one more year...

I'll start spending at least a little time every month in Austin, commuting from LA, and go to at least 3 games.

(I'll also watch Texas win the championship, and witness Durant single-handedly captivate a "football school" and elevate the Horns from a perennial national basketball power to one of the most dominant programs in the nation.)

by the matterhorn on Mar 24, 2007 6:55 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns to Texas for another year....

I will go to Vegas and put $250.00 on Texas to win the National Championship next year.

by Top Jimmy on Mar 25, 2007 5:02 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs

If KD returns

Last year I was able to attend every home game the baylor away and the aggie away game. If KD comes back i will for sure go to every home game (happens anyway so that does not count). I will also go to every conference road game as well as any other game within 300 miles of Austin. I would promise to make it to every away game but i am one broke ass college kid working an 8 dollar an hour job. So if he makes up his mind to come back I will skip summer school pick up a night job and start saving money for my own little longhornroadtrip. I highly reccommend ryan clark continues his trip and site if KD comes back.

Please KD make it one more year

by bb2417 on Mar 26, 2007 1:54 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

f Kevin Durant returns to Texas for another year,

I will: view more Texas basketball on television (here in Houston);
buy Longhorn t-shirts for every member of my family;
celebrate Texas in the Final Four in San Antonio next year; and
watch the Phoenix Suns have an unbelievably bad year next year and then select Kevin as the overall NBA first draft pick, to complement the Sun's running-gunning style.

by bravobevo on Mar 26, 2007 12:31 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs