In discussing plans for our regular PTI segment this Thursday, AW and I decided that, because we were inviting The Other Andrew to join us, we might try something new. The grand idea? Instead of an email exchange, we'd try an instant message exchange.
Setting aside the formatting nightmare of this idea, we probably should have anticipated that three old friends getting together to record a semi-serious segment was an exercise in futility.
Which it was.
If you're brave enough, click through and enjoy the insanity. If you can. It might be worth it if you can get to the point where the Mark Foley jokes start.
Peter (10:43:44 PM): windler, first "real" question is for you - You decided -before- the season to go to Texas-OU as opposed to Texas-Ohio State. Thoughts on it at the time of tOSU? Thoughts now?
OtherAndrew (10:44:16 PM): oh man, great question. you obviously took a day off from work. it mostly stems from the fact that I've got a healthy streak of OU game attendance going (since 3rd grade) and I really dont want to break that up....
Peter (10:46:19 PM): how old are kids in 3rd grade? Good god.
OtherAndrew (10:46:30 PM): plus, I'm not sure how many more there will be at the state fair, and if it's gonna end soon, I want to go out guns ablazin'
Peter (10:46:42 PM): fair
awiggo (10:46:54 PM): fair but have you ever seen a home game as hyped as OSU was?
OtherAndrew (10:47:28 PM): no, i've never seen a game as hyped as tOSU, which was another reason I wasnt sure I wanted to go
OtherAndrew (10:47:40 PM): I know that sounds funny....
awiggo (10:47:46 PM): you thought there was no way the game would live up to the hype?
Peter (10:47:48 PM): Let me tell you, it lived up to the billing. (You had to be there.) err?
Peter (10:48:23 PM): Speaking of hype, do either of you ever get the distinct feeling that your sports life absolutely peaked in January of this year?
awiggo (10:49:19 PM): i hope not. Even if we don't win a NC for another 40 years (gasp), I hope to still be attending games then.
OtherAndrew (10:49:57 PM): i get kinda squirrelly when things arent normal, so when I heard that people were land rushing (it is OU week afterall) I knew that I wouldve had a conniption knowing that someone was nabbing our tailgate spot
Peter (10:49:59 PM): No, but come on. It was OUR first national title. We were there. It was the Rose Bowl. Against the Cocksuckers who "never lost". And the greatest, most dramatic, game, ever.
awiggo (10:51:05 PM): i am right there with you. But I can't admit that there will be nothing better in our lifetime. Imagine if the bball team had won the NC as well. Then we would be talking about the three championships together. That could happen.
Peter (10:51:09 PM): With a quarterback who ties his penis in a double knot around his leg. I'm pretty sure our sports lives peaked.
awiggo (10:51:32 PM): am i the glass half full guy? this doesn't feel right.
Peter (10:51:39 PM): I was gonna say...
OtherAndrew (10:51:42 PM): i'm with wiggins
Peter (10:52:17 PM): Well, I hope y'all are right.
Peter (10:52:23 PM): And damnit, I want a hoops title.
OtherAndrew (10:52:27 PM): i wouldnt use the word peaked, anyway - that's for high school girls who are now ugly
Peter (10:53:01 PM): speaking of hoops - is Kevin Durant the Vince Young of hoops?
OtherAndrew (10:53:35 PM): i'm not sure you can compare basketball players to football players
awiggo (10:53:40 PM): no, KD will only be on campus one year; you can't achieve that kind of greatness in just a single year even if we were to cut the nets down. Not possible
Peter (10:53:43 PM): Try. This is PTI.
OtherAndrew (10:54:03 PM): no, KD will only be on campus one year, you can't achieve that kind of greatness in just a single year even if we were to cut the nets down. Not possible
awiggo (10:54:07 PM): KD will be the best bball player to ever play at texas. Try that one on for size.
Peter (10:54:19 PM): The shoe fits.
Peter (10:54:26 PM): And I think I agree.
Peter (10:54:36 PM): And that's tough for me to say - I looooooooooove TJ
OtherAndrew (10:54:37 PM): i can't get behind that statement just yet since I havent seen him play
OtherAndrew (10:54:46 PM): we all love TJ
Peter (10:54:59 PM): I know; but I'd have babies with TJ.
OtherAndrew (10:55:06 PM): my hair is just like his during his freshman year
Peter (10:55:12 PM): that's super tight
OtherAndrew (10:55:19 PM): "the braided mullet"
Peter (10:55:21 PM): although his game improved dramatically when he shed those nasty things
awiggo (10:55:30 PM): we will be weeping when KD declares in april. we will feel cheated. but we will realize by may that he was the greatest
Peter (10:57:04 PM): Okay, can each of you give me one thing you're legitimately nervous about on Saturday. Most nervous about.
awiggo (10:57:14 PM): peterson.
OtherAndrew (10:57:25 PM): long line at Fletchers
Peter (10:57:45 PM): Give me AP's line for the day:
awiggo (10:57:49 PM): we are all marveling at the numbers wolfe is putting up, but AD is the best back in the nation. If he goes off, we are in serious trouble.
OtherAndrew (10:57:59 PM): AD wont go off
awiggo (10:58:54 PM): AD/AP: over 150 yards we probably lose. Under 100 yards we definitely win.
Peter (10:59:01 PM): can y'all each give me peterson's predicted line for saturday, please?
awiggo (10:59:33 PM): 25 carries, 149 yards, 2 tds.
OtherAndrew (10:59:39 PM): AD - 33 rushes... 145 yards. 3 catches 22 yards
OtherAndrew (10:59:47 PM): theyre gonna run him ragged
Peter (10:59:53 PM): any concerns about paul thompson?
OtherAndrew (11:00:01 PM): none
OtherAndrew (11:00:06 PM): 2 picks
OtherAndrew (11:00:23 PM): 3 if you count the hail mary at the end of the half
awiggo (11:00:28 PM): not really, if he gets the ball to kelly he will have done his job. that and constantly handing off to Peterson.
Peter (11:00:42 PM): any thoughts on psychology of this game?
OtherAndrew (11:00:52 PM): stoops is going to cost peterson at least one year in the NFL this season
awiggo (11:02:07 PM): we win when we play loose. we get creamed when we come out tight. We don't have VY dancing this year. I think there is some concern about how loose we play this one.
OtherAndrew (11:02:27 PM): this game is different than in past years. before last year, we had been in a definite pyschological disadvantage. This year, OU kind of seems piece mealed with the Bomar dismissal
OtherAndrew (11:02:40 PM): so I dont know how to gauge this game
Peter (11:03:08 PM): i'm worried about a slow start
awiggo (11:03:11 PM): I don't like that they had a week off. We only played Sammy but I like their two full weeks more than our single one.
OtherAndrew (11:03:41 PM): i take the other side of that coin
OtherAndrew (11:03:48 PM): i like that we played this week
Peter (11:03:50 PM): me too
Peter (11:03:56 PM): colt reps = good
OtherAndrew (11:03:59 PM): yea
Peter (11:04:12 PM): this team needs an identity - anyone else wondering about that right now?
awiggo (11:04:29 PM): true but I want as much time focusing on OU as possible. I don't think we can be too prepared for this one.
Peter (11:05:02 PM): but i think our guys need to treat this - to the extent possible - as just another opponent
Peter (11:05:12 PM): too much time to sit around and dwell on it could be too much thinking out there
awiggo (11:08:36 PM): how good does our defense have to be? Basically what is the minimum our offense will score?
Peter (11:08:54 PM): i think the offense is good for 27+
OtherAndrew (11:09:19 PM): agreed
Peter (11:09:30 PM): and i -think- our defense will hold them under 30 - if not, we're not half the team we think we are
awiggo (11:10:07 PM): I don't think we will put up 30 or give up 30. I see this one much lower. like 20-17.
OtherAndrew (11:10:18 PM): i'd hope we can hold them under 30
Alcoholic beverage refreshment interlude, coupled with inappropriate discussion of assless chaps.
awiggo (11:25:16 PM): windler, what the west coast vibe on dethroning USC this season?
Peter (11:25:27 PM): is there such a thing as a west coast vibe?
awiggo (11:25:36 PM): yes, only windler knows about it.
OtherAndrew (11:26:24 PM): well, having lived out here last season and this season, it's much less "hollywood" this go round
awiggo (11:26:45 PM): granted, anyway, can cal or oregon win the pac 10?
Peter (11:26:54 PM): i say yes
Peter (11:27:04 PM): well
Peter (11:27:12 PM): i dunno - both defenses suck ass
Peter (11:27:21 PM): though cal's is better and should improve
awiggo (11:27:45 PM): could USC outscore either of them if the Trojan defense fails to show up. I'm not so sure this year that they could win 40-38.
Peter (11:27:51 PM): agree there
Peter (11:27:55 PM): but i think their d is legit
OtherAndrew (11:28:12 PM): i think USC has a stranglehold on the Pac 10 similar to OU's stranglehold on us a few years ago
awiggo (11:28:17 PM): they are good but not as good as their 2004 defense.
Peter (11:28:25 PM): goddamnit windler. i just puked on my keyboard.
OtherAndrew (11:28:41 PM): Cal or Oregon could win, but they'd have to get over the psychological hump
awiggo (11:29:05 PM): but neither of those teams are real rivals with the Trojans.
awiggo (11:29:38 PM): I always thought that was our biggest problem with OU before last year. We were trying too hard and b/c it was always a huge rivalry game.
OtherAndrew (11:29:48 PM): true, but no one likes to get beat up on. right now it feels like USC is rivals with everyone in the Pac 10
awiggo (11:30:26 PM): did either of you see Tommy Tubberville's comments today?
Peter (11:30:36 PM): i saw 'em
Peter (11:30:43 PM): thought they were really dumb
Peter (11:30:48 PM): timing was just awful
Peter (11:30:53 PM): talk about the wrong message
awiggo (11:30:58 PM): he is worried about getting left out again.
OtherAndrew (11:31:10 PM): I thought he was right
Peter (11:31:11 PM): might wanna save those comments for -after- you win all the games
awiggo (11:31:18 PM): bad timing but right message?
OtherAndrew (11:31:19 PM): but yeah, he should wait
OtherAndrew (11:31:25 PM): exactly
OtherAndrew (11:32:06 PM): bean, I have no idea how you're gonna sew this together to make it look coherent
Peter (11:32:17 PM): i was just thinking what a formatting nightmare this is going to be
awiggo (11:32:12 PM): we are almost halfway done - who wins the heisman?
Peter (11:32:57 PM): okay, forget who WILL win the heisman - that'll be boring and obvious soon enough. but garrett wolfe, SHOULD, win it. i'm gonna be CFB's dick vitale on this one - MID-MAJORS, BABY!
OtherAndrew (11:33:21 PM): They should retroactively give it to Vince
awiggo (11:33:23 PM): he has been impressive, but if you could choose one back would you take Wolfe?
Peter (11:33:33 PM): 353 yards. one game.
OtherAndrew (11:33:34 PM): No, I'd take Peterson
awiggo (11:33:39 PM): agreed ? I?ll take AP
Peter (11:33:46 PM): give me peterson in the NFL draft. give me wolfe for the heisman
awiggo (11:33:59 PM): booooooo
OtherAndrew (11:34:00 PM): yup
Peter (11:34:10 PM): who are you booing?
awiggo (11:34:14 PM): you.
Peter (11:34:15 PM): me, wolfe, or peterson?
awiggo (11:34:18 PM): you.
Peter (11:34:19 PM): why?
awiggo (11:34:51 PM): don't factor in the draft. for college, this year, who do want lining up in the backfield? Basically who is the best back in college football?
Peter (11:34:59 PM): garrett wolfe
awiggo (11:35:12 PM): As much as it sucks on the eve of playing OU, but I'd have to say Peterson.
Peter (11:35:43 PM): i'd rather face peterson than that bitch quentin griffin - the poor man's garrett wolfe
awiggo (11:36:20 PM): troy smith or brady quinn or chris leak?
Peter (11:36:26 PM): smith - easy
OtherAndrew (11:36:27 PM): troy smith
awiggo (11:36:39 PM): that was easy. sorry didn't know we all thought alike.
Peter (11:36:48 PM): speaking of quarterbacks, do we get to make spleen jokes now that simmsy is out of the hospital?
awiggo (11:37:18 PM): simms jokes can begin now.
awiggo (11:37:47 PM): i still think we should call our weekly Pick Six betting segment the Chris Simms.
awiggo (11:38:07 PM): maybe after we get by OU.
Peter (11:38:11 PM): deal
Peter (11:38:27 PM): hopefully we'll pick six thompson and we can call 'em that
OtherAndrew (11:39:00 PM): here's a legitimate OU week question
OtherAndrew (11:39:34 PM): you have one stop on your drive up to dallas, do you stop at the Czech stop for some kolaches or at Robertsons for a pound of beef jerky?
awiggo (11:40:07 PM): czech stop, not a jerky fan myself. plus it's on the east side of the road. easier to get to.
Peter (11:40:21 PM): ditto - great jerky can be had
Peter (11:40:26 PM): around town
OtherAndrew (11:40:34 PM): right answer, wrong reason
awiggo (11:40:41 PM): explain please.
OtherAndrew (11:40:46 PM): robertsons is too close to Austin, so you dont stop
awiggo (11:40:57 PM): so you stop there on the way back?
OtherAndrew (11:41:06 PM): yes, so that makes you half right
awiggo (11:41:13 PM): I am learning so much here tonight.
Peter (11:41:17 PM): i feel abused
OtherAndrew (11:41:22 PM): you were immediately disqualified when you said
you werent a jerky fan
awiggo (11:41:28 PM): you feel mark foley'd.
Peter (11:41:32 PM): lol
OtherAndrew (11:41:35 PM): take ur pants off
OtherAndrew (11:41:44 PM): how big is it?
Peter (11:41:44 PM): tell me about your boy parts, andrew
awiggo (11:41:45 PM): meet me at my house around 11
awiggo (11:42:44 PM): and speaking of terrific stories in government - did President Bush sign the anti-poker legislation today?
Peter (11:43:42 PM): it's not in the headlines
OtherAndrew (11:43:42 PM): no clue. I live in LA
awiggo (11:43:58 PM): not on cnn. maybe tomorrow.
Peter (11:44:06 PM): oh wait - he did sign some big border fence law - and i know the poker shit was buried in there
Peter (11:44:11 PM): what douchebags
Peter (11:44:26 PM): i'm furious
Peter (11:45:43 PM): i'm really pleased that the government is legislating this.
awiggo (11:45:54 PM): now masters students are going to have to come up with another reason for dropping out.
OtherAndrew (11:46:06 PM): for the record, i quit gambling after i lost all my money
Peter (11:46:11 PM): that was dumb.
Peter (11:46:18 PM): you can't catch up if you quit playing
OtherAndrew (11:46:22 PM): and got married
awiggo (11:46:24 PM): double down.
Peter (11:46:26 PM): you're married?
OtherAndrew (11:46:31 PM): vegas
Peter (11:46:37 PM): shotgun, baby
OtherAndrew (11:46:40 PM): it was a bourbony haze
awiggo (11:46:43 PM): in the car?
Peter (11:47:00 PM): i might just post this entire transcript and see what happens
Peter (11:52:29 PM): who are y'alls three favorite horns right now?
Peter (11:52:52 PM): i'm going with limas sweed, jamaal charles, and brian robison
awiggo (11:53:08 PM): jamaal, orakpo, and mi griffin
Peter (11:53:20 PM): love both those guys wiggo
OtherAndrew (11:53:40 PM): kelson, shipley, mi griffin
awiggo (11:53:50 PM): ship are u kidding?
Peter (11:53:50 PM): kelson owns too
Peter (11:53:59 PM): how can ship be one of your faves?
awiggo (11:54:21 PM): just b/c he is fast and white like you?
OtherAndrew (11:54:39 PM): nah, I?ve just heard enough off the record stories
Peter (11:54:56 PM): ok, that's fair
Peter (11:55:00 PM): you have insider info
OtherAndrew (11:55:04 PM): here's an off record story
OtherAndrew (11:56:23 PM): [REDACTED]
OtherAndrew (11:57:08 PM): [REDACTED]
OtherAndrew (11:57:39 PM): [REDACTED]
Peter (11:57:51 PM): dear god
OtherAndrew (11:58:22 PM): [REDACTED]
OtherAndrew (12:01:38 AM): anyway, that?s why I love Ship. New topic: Favorite horns of your lifetime?
awiggo (12:01:47 AM): football only?
OtherAndrew (12:02:12 AM): 3 football, 3 total
Peter (12:02:34 AM): football: vince, stoney clark, derrick johnson....
awiggo (12:02:35 AM): major, cash brothers, westbrook.
awiggo (12:02:47 AM): and of course vince.
OtherAndrew (12:02:59 AM): stoney clark - because he was a poet?
Peter (12:03:11 AM): yeah - total goofball, plus single best OU moment of my lifetime
OtherAndrew (12:03:29 AM): yup.... that game comes on ESPiN classic on frida
Peter (12:03:33 AM): no shit?
Peter (12:03:36 AM): what time
OtherAndrew (12:03:37 AM): no shit
OtherAndrew (12:03:40 AM): not sure
Peter (12:03:44 AM): i'll look it up
Peter (12:03:46 AM): thanks
OtherAndrew (12:03:56 AM): all sports?
Peter (12:04:07 AM): vince, ford are 1-2 easy
OtherAndrew (12:04:13 AM): too easy
awiggo (12:04:26 AM): i can't remember which game it was but I was really little, I remember being blown away by singing the eyes of texas as we exited the stadium. I think I must have been sitting in the upper deck.
OtherAndrew (12:04:46 AM): UofH?
awiggo (12:04:51 AM): no, it was a tx/ou game
Peter (12:04:55 AM): that UH game was unreal
Peter (12:05:03 AM): i was in the upper deck for that one
OtherAndrew (12:05:08 AM): get that idiot off the goalpost!
Peter (12:05:16 AM): lol
awiggo (12:05:16 AM): me too.
Peter (12:05:33 AM): wiggins secretly loves the 1990 cotton bowl, too
OtherAndrew (12:05:38 AM): homo
awiggo (12:05:49 AM): vividly remember that one. That game was also the loudest I have ever heard DKR Texas Memorial Stadium/The Ranch
OtherAndrew (12:05:57 AM): dont call it that
awiggo (12:06:02 AM): The corral
Peter (12:06:04 AM): i liked The Library
OtherAndrew (12:06:44 AM): whats funny about the library is that i remember one time when Will came to a game from the actual library. had his books and everything... nerd
Peter (12:06:54 AM): now here's a question - would you date a sooner girl?
awiggo (12:07:18 AM): probably not, teeth are a must for me.
Peter (12:07:38 AM): agree - i'm not related to any, for that matter, so unlikely to begin with
OtherAndrew (12:07:58 AM): both get fired at the same time
awiggo (12:08:10 AM): the exact same time?
OtherAndrew (12:08:14 AM): although A&M pays dearly for their firing
awiggo (12:08:21 AM): $$$$$$$$$$$$$$
Peter (12:08:22 AM): how?
OtherAndrew (12:08:23 AM): the ADs synchronize watches
awiggo (12:08:29 AM): isn't RC still getting paid?
OtherAndrew (12:08:45 AM): I think hes finally off the docket, but Fran is good til 2012
Peter (12:08:49 AM): i must say - i really enjoy watching a&m suffer
Peter (12:08:52 AM): like, a lot
OtherAndrew (12:08:52 AM): me too
awiggo (12:08:58 AM): love it.
OtherAndrew (12:09:08 AM): squeeze ags
Peter (12:09:15 AM): i'm a sick puppy - i really like them unhappy
awiggo (12:09:17 AM): I also like their unrealistic dreams: tubberville, kubiak, etc.
OtherAndrew (12:09:34 AM): yup, butch davis is another one tossed around
awiggo (12:09:36 AM): weis, chizik, carroll,
Peter (12:09:43 AM): aggies crack me up
awiggo (12:09:47 AM): davis is a possibility. the others are not.
OtherAndrew (12:09:59 AM): i hate it that they'll be #2 in the big 12 in basketball
awiggo (12:10:22 AM): i'm not there yet. KU is a clear number one but we have tons more talent, all freshman though.
Peter (12:10:32 AM): it's A&M - they'll fuck it up
awiggo (12:10:35 AM): thug basketball is not real basketball.
Peter (12:10:41 AM): exactly
Peter (12:10:46 AM): their ceiling isn't that high
Peter (12:10:47 AM): texas' is
OtherAndrew (12:10:54 AM): i'll agree with that
awiggo (12:10:56 AM): 50 points a game it tough to watch at the college level.
Peter (12:11:08 AM): thank god kelvin thugson is gone
OtherAndrew (12:11:14 AM): it's tough to watch at the women?s level
Peter (12:11:24 AM): you've seen women play basketball?
OtherAndrew (12:11:30 AM): no
OtherAndrew (12:11:37 AM): thats a ridiculous question
awiggo (12:11:42 AM): how high do you jump when you see a layup highlight?
Peter (12:11:43 AM): you're right.
OtherAndrew (12:12:01 AM): 3 inches? no clue
awiggo (12:12:15 AM): mickelson level. I get it.
Peter (12:12:26 AM): speaking of women's sports, i think i'm going to check out these volleyball gazelles one of these days at gregory
OtherAndrew (12:12:45 AM): you should
awiggo (12:12:49 AM): i don't know. women that tall scare me.
Peter (12:12:50 AM): i think it'd be fun
OtherAndrew (12:12:58 AM): i loved AHS games
Peter (12:13:02 AM): and the tallness isn't scaring me off
awiggo (12:13:16 AM): you are like a foot taller than me. I don't expect you to be scared.
Peter (12:13:43 AM): you?re a hobbit
awiggo (12:17:01 AM): speaking of UT athletes - i had a former cheerleader apply for a job with me.
Peter (12:17:12 AM): tell me you hired her wiggins
awiggo (12:17:24 AM): I haven't brought her in yet. Don't worry though.
awiggo (12:17:41 AM): it may be the longest interview I ever conduct.
Peter (12:17:50 AM): don't bother mentioning the open position to the girlfriend.
Peter (12:17:54 AM): she'll ask who filled it
Peter (12:17:59 AM): and when she figures it out, you're done
Peter (12:18:02 AM): D-U-N we can practice how this conversation will go.
Peter (12:18:15 AM): "you hired a CHEERLEADER?"
awiggo (12:18:23 AM): yes and I'd do it again.
Peter (12:18:31 AM): "i thought i knew you"
awiggo (12:18:35 AM): she's really smart.
Peter (12:18:47 AM): "by smart i assume you mean 'great tits'"
awiggo (12:18:49 AM): and down to earth
awiggo (12:18:55 AM): she loves kids.
Peter (12:19:02 AM): "she wants babies with my boyfriend"
awiggo (12:19:03 AM): unmatched credentials.
awiggo (12:19:24 AM): very personable. easy to work with. a real gem.
Peter (12:19:36 AM): "fine. then date her. see if i care."
OtherAndrew (12:19:36 AM): ps, my wife is watching you guys and is gonna call your girlfriends tomorrow
awiggo (12:19:53 AM): classic.
Peter (12:19:56 AM): oh, thanks windler. (hi erinn)
OtherAndrew (12:20:10 AM): my wife: "do guys really talk like that?"
OtherAndrew (12:20:15 AM): i said no
Peter (12:20:15 AM): windler, tell her for me, will ya: i love cats and cuddling and monogamy
OtherAndrew (12:21:09 AM): she's bored and has left the room
OtherAndrew (12:21:17 AM): tits
Peter (12:21:20 AM): lol
OtherAndrew (12:21:28 AM): sorry, had to get that out
Peter (12:21:36 AM): it felt right
awiggo (12:21:50 AM): no problems here.
awiggo (12:23:39 AM): anyway, i'm spent. r we done? is any of this postable?
OtherAndrew (12:23:57 AM): no
Peter (12:23:58 AM): most of this is garbage. entertaining garbage. so, yeah, most of it's going up