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The Kitchen Sink: Part Deux

Justin K. Aller - Getty Images

The Grove sounds awesome. Somebody who lives in Austin should scout out an area where we can replicate this scene for Ole Miss's visit to the Forty Acres next season. I'll start the "what'll you take responsibility for?" list: You can sign me up for three kegs (15 gallons) of homebrew and 50lbs of smoked brisket. Somebody take this idea and run with it.

In this week's TKS, I talk Boise State (because I miss all their drama), Baylor, WVU, and, of course, Sooner tears.

First up - by virtue of playing on Thursday night (just like the local JV!) - let's talk some Boise State Broncos. BSU appears to have regressed to their historical mean. Their game against BYU was hard to watch on a number of levels. First, 7-6 should never be the final score of an FBS football game, unless it's played in a league that rhymes with "yes, we pee." Second, that ridiculous blue field burns my eyeballs. I know they talk about how unique it is, and how special it is, and they're not getting rid of it, yada yada yada. But the fact is, that thing is hideous. It makes the little patch of skin on the back of my elbow look like Keira Knightly in Victoria's Secret.

Jump ahead a couple of days to the big-boy games. I'm going to talk about Baylor and WVU together, since they play this Saturday. Neither one of these teams has a defense, but they both feature video-game offenses that can put up a ton of points. Baylor nearly lost to ULM (although it's a testament to ULM this year that, because of the nature of their games so far this season, you know what ULM stands for without having to go look it up) before slinking out of Monroe with a narrow victory. If they ever get a defense, the rest of the conference should be worried.

WVU is an odd team. I watched and/or listened to most of that game, and here are my takeaways. First, they are overrated. Their offense is good - particularly Tavon Austin - but not spectacular. And if they can't throw it, they're screwed. They had something like 24 yards of rushing on Saturday. For the game. Against Maryland. That works out to about 1ypc. Against, as I said, Maryland. QB Geno Smith throws a nice ball, but he doesn't particularly like to be hit, and my guess is if we can lay hands on him early, he'll go full Landry-Jones on us.

No idea what the line is for the BU/WVU game, but I'm taking the over, and I'm guessing whoever has the ball last wins. Figure something like 84-77, WVU, with about 2,000 total yards of offense.

Last but certainly not least: Kansas State went into the Sooners' house and punched them in the face, coming out with a rare win for the visiting team in Norman. KSU is like Iceman; they just wear you down until you make a mistake, and then you're dead. They are boring and dangerous. Klein was efficient if not spectacular, completing 13 passes for 149 yards with neither a TD nor an interception. As a team, KSU ran for 217 yards total. Their longest play from scrimmage was a 36-yard run. Boring boring boring.

OU completed over twice as many passes (28) for twice as many yards (298) plus a TD and an INT. They rushed for 89 yards (not a typo). Landry Jones looked flustered all night behind a shaky O-line. As much as I wanted OU to be unbeaten when we play them in a few weeks, them losing is always funny - and there's a decent chance they lose again in two weeks at Texas Tech.

The Aggies apparently played again this week, but nobody cares since none of their games are in Texas. Ohio State continues to be ranked (#14 AP) by the press, although the coaches seem to be paying more attention and continue to leave them off the ballot. How good is Notre Dame? Good enough to be ranked by the press ahead of Texas (#10, AP). Coaches have them slightly behind us (#11, Coaches). Personally, I have no idea. Their schedule - Big10-centric as it is - makes it very hard to make a legitimate argument that they're a top 10 team.

Finally, I'd like to say that Gary Danielson says some of the stupidest things I've ever heard on live television. I'm not even going to give an example, because I don't want to sound retarded by association. Feel free to post your favorite examples - along with whatever else is on your mind - in the comments below.